As I mentioned in a previous post, I’ve been doing a little of shopping on eBay lately. The seller of one of the items I purchased emailed me to chat, we are both collectors of the same thing, and we had a nice little chat about it. Over the course of the conversation, she mentioned casually that it was nice talking to me and that she should probably mail my item out soon.
Now this came as a bit of a shock to me as I bought said item on March 19th and this conversation was taking place on March 27th. I understand that not everyone mails the same day of purchase but 8 days later and the seller is only just thinking that she should “probably” mail it soon? The listing doesn’t have a handling time listed, I went back and checked but, in my own person view of the world, 8 days is an unreasonable amount of time for her to not have even mailed it yet.
I was a little upset about this as I had assumed the item would be arriving soon but, as I said, we’d been chatting and friendly so I didn’t want to be a jerk. I simply said, please do mail it soon, I am looking forward to getting my items. This conversation happened early Friday so my hope was that she would get the items out Friday or Saturday. Instead, she emailed me on Sunday and said, “I’ll try to mail it sometime next week.”
Wait, you’ll “try” to mail it “sometime” next week? So I may be looking at a full 2 weeks after purchase before you ship this item? I have a right to be a little ticked at this, right?
Now this seller is obviously a casual seller and doesn’t have much feedback. But here is the moral dilemma I have to put to you, my fellow online buyers and sellers.
She is otherwise a nice person. We chatted. A part of me feels like it would be very wrong of me to give her anything less than all 5 stars since she does so little business, a single bad rating could really cripple her. I would only be talking about a lower star rating in shipping time as, assuming the item arrives in promised condition, is the only issue at hand as communication and shipping costs are fine.
But the other part of me knows that I mail within 24 hours of payment and still have to work to remind buyers to give me 5 stars. Shouldn’t my 24 hour ship time count for more than her 2 week ship time? If we were grading on a curve here, her rating should be pretty low on this.
The seller in me, though, knows how damaging a bad rating can be. Feedback shouldn’t be personal but it can be so damaging to a seller, it has become more so. I have to ask myself, is this delay worth crippling her, albeit casual, business?
While all this is conjecture at this point as I have yet to even get the item in my hand yet so there is plenty of time for things to go more right or more wrong, with the facts as they are above, I have to ask, what do you think I should do?
Or, better yet, in this same situation, what would you do?

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I would let it go because the next buyer she has will get her kicked off the site.
Just tell her you really would appreciate her mailing it today, time is of the essence.
I would let it go because the next buyer she has will get her kicked off the site.
Just tell her you really would appreciate her mailing it today, time is of the essence.
I wouldn’t leave her any star rating on shipping time at all, and email her and tell her why. That you understand she is a casual seller but if she wants to be able to sell on eBay in the future she needs to improve or someone else is going to come along and ding her, and next thing she knows she won’t be allowed to sell anymore. If she is friendly she should be able to take this constructive advice from you…
I wouldn’t leave her any star rating on shipping time at all, and email her and tell her why. That you understand she is a casual seller but if she wants to be able to sell on eBay in the future she needs to improve or someone else is going to come along and ding her, and next thing she knows she won’t be allowed to sell anymore. If she is friendly she should be able to take this constructive advice from you…
I’d tell her she needs to speed it up and not leave any stars…but, you haven’t gotten it yet..maybe it isn’t just the shipping time that’s inferior…Even a casual seller has the responsibility to provide good customer service.
I’d tell her she needs to speed it up and not leave any stars…but, you haven’t gotten it yet..maybe it isn’t just the shipping time that’s inferior…Even a casual seller has the responsibility to provide good customer service.
Honestly I would give a low shipping time star rating. I’d feel guilty doing it but it is important to ship in a timely manner regardless of who you are. And if this is a really casual seller they won’t even have 10 stars so they’ll never know (unless you are the one that NARUs them).
One thing I wanted to add to this is that I looked and her DSRs are rather low to begin with so I wouldn’t be the one getting her suspended alone as she in on 3 for each rating already.
When I say casual, I also mean about 500 feedbacks spread out over a few years, not like 10 feedbacks. Just to clarify.
Thanks for the responses, keep ’em comin’!
Honestly I would give a low shipping time star rating. I’d feel guilty doing it but it is important to ship in a timely manner regardless of who you are. And if this is a really casual seller they won’t even have 10 stars so they’ll never know (unless you are the one that NARUs them).
One thing I wanted to add to this is that I looked and her DSRs are rather low to begin with so I wouldn’t be the one getting her suspended alone as she in on 3 for each rating already.
When I say casual, I also mean about 500 feedbacks spread out over a few years, not like 10 feedbacks. Just to clarify.
Thanks for the responses, keep ’em comin’!
If I were in this situation, I’d use this as an opportunity to educate the seller. Perhaps she’s naive and really doesn’t know. Perhaps she doesn’t realize how important timely shipping is. It can’t hurt to send her a short note and tell her that in order to continue to sell profitably on eBay, she MUST ship in a timely fashion, and that you expected she would have done so for your item.
You can always choose not to leave feedback at all, until you hear back from her. I think her reply would shape what sort of feedback you should leave.
If I were in this situation, I’d use this as an opportunity to educate the seller. Perhaps she’s naive and really doesn’t know. Perhaps she doesn’t realize how important timely shipping is. It can’t hurt to send her a short note and tell her that in order to continue to sell profitably on eBay, she MUST ship in a timely fashion, and that you expected she would have done so for your item.
You can always choose not to leave feedback at all, until you hear back from her. I think her reply would shape what sort of feedback you should leave.
It comes down to which you hate more: her casual approach to shipping your item, or John Donahoe’s innate contempt for all small sellers and their way of life- and his desire for YOU to do his dirtywork.
I would err on the side of the crappy seller because they aren’t going to pocket a $2.1 M bonus for their poor performance. But Donahoe is.
Besides there is always the outside chance that some aspect of her transaction will truly impress you. Not likely in the case of JD.
It comes down to which you hate more: her casual approach to shipping your item, or John Donahoe’s innate contempt for all small sellers and their way of life- and his desire for YOU to do his dirtywork.
I would err on the side of the crappy seller because they aren’t going to pocket a $2.1 M bonus for their poor performance. But Donahoe is.
Besides there is always the outside chance that some aspect of her transaction will truly impress you. Not likely in the case of JD.
Are you fn kidding me. Some people have real jobs and real careers and try to make a little side money in their spare time of which there is hardly none.
This next day shipping bs that has been promoted as the norm is far from it, unless you have employees with an automated inventory and shipping system.
The only reason someone should be kicked off EBay is for not shipping anything or shipping easily verifiable junk.
Shipping imported knockoffs quickly should not be the standard by which we are all measured.
I would gladly wait a month for a treasured one of a kind item that’s been hidden away for years.
If I want modern mass produced items, I’ll shop at a store that specialized in that item.
Upon seeing this quote from the great sage, “givemeabreak” who posts under the obviously real upyours@gmail.com, I realized I never updated you guys on this saga.
So when a month had passed with no item, I finally emailed again and asked for the status and tracking. Seller gave me a hard time saying that I had specifically requested the item be held back (which is a pure fabrication) and then gave me a song and dance about a tracking number for a week before admitting there was no tracking number. At this point, I filed a claim and the seller instantly refunded my money in full before PayPal even touched the claim which was nice of her. I was mildly miffed that before she refunded she inserted the lie “I gave the buyer the tracking number already” into the claim but, whatever, she gave me my money back. At that point, I emailed her and said, I appreciate the quick refund, if the item arrives later on I will pay again.
Then she tells me the package was actually returned to her a few days ago (!!??!!) and that she resent it to me and I can just pay for it again when it arrives. So annoying that she kept changing her story about the tracking number, when she mailed it and that the package was returned to her but, since she gave me my money back, I guess it is moot.
If the item arrives, I will indeed pay her again and, if it doesn’t, no harm done I suppose. Either way, it looks like feedback is going to be a non-issue since I am unlikely to get this item within the time limit for leaving feedback.
Oh and “upyours”‘s comment I am not going to bother answering since I have used a lot of real estate on that topic already on this blog.
Are you fn kidding me. Some people have real jobs and real careers and try to make a little side money in their spare time of which there is hardly none.
This next day shipping bs that has been promoted as the norm is far from it, unless you have employees with an automated inventory and shipping system.
The only reason someone should be kicked off EBay is for not shipping anything or shipping easily verifiable junk.
Shipping imported knockoffs quickly should not be the standard by which we are all measured.
I would gladly wait a month for a treasured one of a kind item that’s been hidden away for years.
If I want modern mass produced items, I’ll shop at a store that specialized in that item.
Upon seeing this quote from the great sage, “givemeabreak” who posts under the obviously real upyours@gmail.com, I realized I never updated you guys on this saga.
So when a month had passed with no item, I finally emailed again and asked for the status and tracking. Seller gave me a hard time saying that I had specifically requested the item be held back (which is a pure fabrication) and then gave me a song and dance about a tracking number for a week before admitting there was no tracking number. At this point, I filed a claim and the seller instantly refunded my money in full before PayPal even touched the claim which was nice of her. I was mildly miffed that before she refunded she inserted the lie “I gave the buyer the tracking number already” into the claim but, whatever, she gave me my money back. At that point, I emailed her and said, I appreciate the quick refund, if the item arrives later on I will pay again.
Then she tells me the package was actually returned to her a few days ago (!!??!!) and that she resent it to me and I can just pay for it again when it arrives. So annoying that she kept changing her story about the tracking number, when she mailed it and that the package was returned to her but, since she gave me my money back, I guess it is moot.
If the item arrives, I will indeed pay her again and, if it doesn’t, no harm done I suppose. Either way, it looks like feedback is going to be a non-issue since I am unlikely to get this item within the time limit for leaving feedback.
Oh and “upyours”‘s comment I am not going to bother answering since I have used a lot of real estate on that topic already on this blog.